行政助理

1~5年經驗／大學／英美語文學類

修改後自傳：

Autobiography

It is my pleasure to have this opportunity to introduce myself to you. My name is ＯＯ-ＯＯＯ ＯＯＯＯＯ, and my English name is ＯＯＯＯＯＯＯ. I was born in ＯＯＯＯＯＯ. I am optimistic and always willing to learn new things. My parents, teachers and friends say that I am considerate, humorous and outgoing, and they know that I thrive in any social situation. In addition to being confident and independent, I am self-disciplined and possess a strong sense of responsibility.
As the oldest child in my family, being a role model for my younger siblings has made me an independent person. My father is very open-minded and is always supportive of my ideas. I was brought up to be a positive and active person, and always do my best to achieve my goals, even when it seems tough.
I graduated from the International Business program in the Department of Applied English at ＯＯＯＯ ＯＯＯＯＯ University, where I scored 755 on the Test of English for International Communication in my senior year. I also took classes to broaden my computer skills and earned four TQC certificates: Word, PowerPoint, English Key-in and Chinese Key-in.
While at university, I participated in many extracurricular activities, during which I accumulated precious experiences. I participated in the guitar club, and became club president in my second year, managing a community of nearly 200 people. I was also in charge of a combined musical achievement concert in which four schools were involved, and participated in a “Children’s Suicide Prevention” drama series promoting public advocacy activities, working as a planning assistant, for which I received an utive commendation. In addition, I was the captain of the department volleyball team, which had a great impact on me, and I learned a great deal from my teammates. All of these experiences taught me that communication and interaction between people is critical, and verbal skills are indispensable.
However, university was not just studying and fun and games for me, as I also worked part-time as a clerk at a ＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯ supermarket. The job provided a good opportunity to learn about customer service, as it required good customer relation skills, maintaining a pleasant demeanor and a passion for the work. I also gained experience in dealing with customer complaints in a professional manner. Sometimes customers had strange requests about service, but I always did my best to satisfy their demands.
To summarize, I am an optimistic, outgoing and responsible person. I regard myself as someone who dares to try; I have great ambitions, and I have the determination to achieve my goals and do my best at my job. I like to challenge myself and push my limits, which is one reason I am applying for this job.
I sincerely hope to take advantage of my knowledge of languages and marketing in offering my services to your company. I believe my hard-working attitude, determination and constant desire to learn more will serve the company well.

修改建議：
Your resume was quite well designed and looked good – well done!

You left the “desired position” and “Summary” sections blank. Remember to add something there before you mail it to a prospective employer.

Do not put a space before a colon or semicolon (or comma, question mark or exclamation mark), but always put a space after it. So “Courses: ” not “Courses :” Also, be careful not to use a Chinese-language font for punctuation, like “：”. Use the default Western font with English text throughout – “:”

For simple lists like the courses you studied, use a comma to separate the different subjects, which makes it easier to read. Semi-colons work better for a list of longer phrases.

Remember to use “an” only before words that start with a vowel sound (a, e, i, o or u, or words like “hour” or “heir”).

Avoid using abbreviations, which not everyone might understand. It’s better to be clear, so don’t just use “TOEIC,” but write “Test of English for International Communication.” You can add (TOEIC) if you will refer to it again, or if you think the abbreviation is well-known.

Be consistent with your presentation of facts. For example, don’t mix up all-caps headings and title-case headings (“Extracurricular Activities” and “CAPABILITIES.”) Choose one or the other.

Do not use a comma before “and” in simple lists, but use it in more complicated cases, like this: “My parents, teachers and friends say that I am considerate, humorous and outgoing, and they believe...”

You do not need “including” when you list everything. So not “I earned four TQC certificates including Word, PowerPoint, English Key-in and Chinese Key-in,” but just “I earned four TQC certificates: Word, PowerPoint, English Key-in and Chinese Key-in.” You should use “including” when you list some but not all of the elements: “I earned four TQC certificates, including Word and PowerPoint.”

The word “critical” already means “very important,” so you don’t need to say “really critical.” The same goes for words like “priceless,” “exceptional,” “unique,” etc.

You don’t need “and” if you say “also,” so you don’t need to say “And I also...” – Just “I also...”

You don’t need to repeat too much information that you have already listed in your resume, so I took out parts of the sentence about the volleyball team in your biography.

You might want to add details of your part-time work experience to the table in your resume.

“Your esteemed company” is a bit old-fashioned. Just say “your company” or “the company.”