行政人員

1~5年經驗／大學／英美語文學類

修改後自傳：

I am O-O O. I am OO years old. My family and friends describe me as a confident, independent, outgoing, considerate and optimistic person. I have a good sense of humor and thrive in any social situation. At work, I am reliable, disciplined and willing to learn new things. I am a team player, but I also feel comfortable working independently.

I studied Finance at OO Institute of Technology between OOOO and OOOO. In summer OOOO and winter OOOO, I interned at OO Commercial Bank where I was responsible for administrative operations and word processing. During my internship, I not only learned skills that are essential for my job, but also the importance of teamwork and discipline. I showed a positive attitude and worked efficiently.

While I was pursuing my studies, I became interested in finance and decided to volunteer at the finance department in the student association and became the general administrative chairman. I reviewed project budgets and negotiated with companies so that our project team would have a better chance at using their resources efficiently. I worked with many hard-working and creative individuals, and delivered every project successfully. I dedicated most of my after-school hours to this organization and gained valuable experiences.

In OOOO, I attended O University where I earned a degree in English literature. I wanted to learn more about the English language and aimed to deepen my knowledge in English literature. I enjoyed studying English; it amazes me how individuals can express themselves in a foreign language so fluently.

In O OOOO, I started working at OOO Engineering Corporation as secretary to the general manager at the chief executive office. My responsibilities included supporting senior management and executives, managing external communication, executive scheduling and administrative tasks. This job allowed me to learned how to stay focused while multitasking. I proved myself a fast learner, capable of adapting to all situations, as well as delivering high-quality work with minimal supervision.

In O last O, I went on a working holiday in O to gain experience. It was a great opportunity for me to learn how to live and work in a foreign country. O is a beautiful country with plenty of natural resources and friendly people. It has a diverse culture and background given that there are many people from different cultural backgrounds living there. I made many friends that I enjoyed spending time with and from whom I learned a lot.

I am a positive, social and reliable person. I consider myself as someone who is open to trying new things. I consider myself as an ambitious, determined and dedicated person who tries her best to achieve her goals. I am willing to get out of my comfort zone; challenge myself and push my limits. That is why I am applying for this job.

修改建議：
Overall, your resume is well-structured and informative.

However, in the sixth paragraph, you have written extensively about your travels in O without providing any details about the type of work you have performed. In total, you have written seven sentences about O. In contrast, you have written only four sentences about your job experience at OOO Engineering Corp.

Bear in mind that your resume needs to explain your skills and abilities to prospective employees in a quick, efficient and clear manner. You should focus on your experiences, skills and qualities. There is no need to promote O, that is why I cut out the last sentence of that paragraph.

If you must talk about your travels, you need to explain how they affected you in ways that would help you become better at your job. Saying that you have learned "a lot" is hardly enough.