工讀生
1~5年經驗／大學／區域研究學類
Biography: OOO O O O I am studying at O University with double majors in the Department of O O O O as well as the Department of O O. I come from a O family of O: My father is engaged in commerce, my mother is an office worker, my younger brother is a college freshman and my grandmother is a retiree. I believe that learning a new language provides an opportunity to gain an understanding of new cultures, which enables one to see things from a different perspective. To rack up some practical experience while studying at university, I took part-time jobs during the winter and summer vacations: I worked as an administrative assistant and on the activity staff at public exhibitions. From this working experience, I built valuable social, communication and problem-solving skills in a professional environment. I also learned how to cooperate efficiently with people, but, most importantly, the experience taught me that even a momentary oversight can lead to trouble and that the devil is in the detail. I did not want to waste time at college, so I applied myself diligently to my schoolwork, and maintained an unbroken minimum semester grade average of OO throughout. During the OOOO summer vacation I passed the O-O BO Proficiency Test, and achieved a score of OOO in the Test of English for International Communication (TOEIC). Although I am a novice in this field, I feel that I am qualified for all requirements listed in your advertisement: 1) I have adequate knowledge and experience to support this position. 2) I have a good command of English and German. 3) I have good teamwork and communication skills backed up by my extracurricular experience. If I manage to snag the opportunity to work for your company, I will spare no effort in accomplishing the tasks assigned by superiors.
Remember to count yourself when listing people in your family: “There are O people in my family. My father … my mother … my younger brother … and my grandma.” This means you come from a family of O. Also, “grandma” is too informal for a job application. Rather use “grandmother.”
“my younger brother is a freshmen” should be “my younger brother is a freshman.”
“When I expose myself to another language, I also have a touch on a new culture” sounds a bit strange. It is more straightforward to say: “By learning a new language, I gain an understanding of new cultures.”
Instead of saying, “From those working experience, I learned social skills when interacting and communicating with professional people and ability to solve problems,” you could more simply say: “From this working experience, I learned valuable social, communication and problem-solving skills in a professional environment.”
Avoid abbreviations, like TOEIC: Not everyone will know what you mean. Also, note that the “T” in “TOEIC” stands for “Test,” so it would be redundant to write “I got OOO on [the] TOEIC test.”
“I have good command of English and Germanish” should be something like “I have a good command of English and German.”
Instead of saying, “Although I am a novice in this field, I am qualified for this position according to the requirements which were described in your advertisement,” you can say something like: “Although I am a novice in this field, I feel that I am qualified for every single requirement listed in your advertisement:”
Since you list the specific qualifications, it might be helpful to make a numbered list (1, 2, etc.), which makes it much easier for the reader to identify each point.
In your conclusion, rather than “I will spare no effort to accomplish tasks assigned by superior. Hope that you can give me a chance to work in your company. I will try my best to work in here,” just be brief: “If I get the opportunity to work for your company, I will spare no effort in accomplishing the tasks assigned by superiors.”